My college monsters waited up to greet me at midnight. Jason was the only one who ended his greeting with a period. I asked him to place an exclamation point for emphasis. He did.
I watched an episode of Awkward and laughed and laughed because the wit is back.
My sister took out a cupcake from the fridge, stuck two small candles in the middle, lit them up, and served them to me singing an out-of-tune happy birthday medley. I laughed at her and completed the song in a seductive tone. She laughed at me because I am a clown.
I am now watching Sixteen Candles because "I can't believe this. They fucking forgot my birthday." Doesn't apply to me. There's a birthday cake in the fridge. They'll probably "surprise" me later but ha ha who are they surprising? The girl who is still awake at 1am, rummaging the fridge for snacks? Ho hey.
It is wonderful to be 25, fresh out of the shower, a pimple in my forehead, chapped lips, mosquito bites in my legs, and still an almost-200-lb beauty.
Hey world, I love you.
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