4.08.2012

my thoughts are stars i can't fathom into constellations

I planned on reading something heartbreaking over the weekend. Weird, yes? (I'm a bad Catholic, you see. I did not spend Holy Week the sacred way.) Going over the bookshelf did not help, so I ended up scanning a Nora Roberts book Friday morning, which I put down 6 chapters after. Joining my aunt and brother upstairs who were having a TVD marathon, we gorged over fastfood takeout and ogled at the Salvatores and Elijah and Klaus -- with Biboy mastering the art of eye rolling.

Saturday was spent in the Hamptons with the Graysons and Emily Thorne. This time, we feasted on pizza and pasta. By mid-afternoon, there was still this itch to read something worthwhile, so I asked my sister and aunt to buy me a book. 3 malls and 3 bookstores later, I hugged a sky blue hardbound by nightfall. I wanted very much to pour over it at once but by the time I positioned myself in bed, weariness crept and I was snoring in no time.

Spent most of today reading The Fault In Our Stars (and if you knew me, there were a lot of commercials in between. Heh.). I have been wanting to acquire a copy of this book ever since coming across it at Goodreads, but then joining Mensis Liber's book giveaway last month led me to postpone it -- all for that 1% possibility of winning a copy, which (you guessed it right) I didn't.

Although I did want to win it badly to save me a few pesos, I don't think I wasted a single centavo in purchasing this book. It was, in my opinion, a spectacle to be devoured. I laughed, giggled, fell in love, cried. It is both heart-wrenching and charming. Everyone was likable, from Hazel to Augustus to Isaac to their parents; even the snotty Peter Van Houten can be counted in. Hazel and Gus, two cancer-stricken teens, were so pure and so real, they compel you and then suck you in. Their conversations are a joy to read and profound at that, ranging from metaphors to oblivion to death to infinities.

I prepared for a sobfest, knowing that this book spells cancer from start to finish. One thing I hate about having breaks in between reading a great book is that somewhere along the way, I lose the momentum I built and am left literally cursing myself for making that happen. There were parts where I had myself thinking "Fuck this, I should be crying by now!!!!" but all I have is my left eye tearing because of dirt. But, hell, when Gus' father told Hazel "He loved you so much. He really did," during Gus' funeral, I broke down. I wept like a kid with a bruised knee and gods, I don't usually cry. And it went on when Hazel went to his coffin and told Gus it was okay and then kissed him and tucked a pack of cigarettes beside him and told him that he can light them and she won't mind, I went bonkers. Everything else was light after that. And I ended the book with a happy heart.

**I know I've been stalling on A Clash of Kings for quite a time now, not moving forward, really. I only get to read it during spare time at work. Last week had been hectic so even if I had it in my bag, it remained stagnant. With the series already airing, pray that I get to finish the book before the season finale airs. Hee.

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